The unsatisfying resolution of the Dominique Strauss-Kahn case raises tough questions of race, sex, power, and law. Indeed, this one murky encounter and its muddled aftermath could be used as a prism through which to dissect the very nature of morals in our sometimes unsettling globalized world. Or, you could just say: fuck everybody involved.

That's the tactic adopted by professional newspaper writer and Hot Sexxxy Sex Analyst Andrea Peyser in her column today. DSK is bad:

Whose company would you prefer, New Yorkers? A rich, horny, Gallic goof-ball who enjoys oral sex with a hotel maid, then skips off to lunch with his 26-year-old daughter as if to celebrate his rapid close encounter

His accuser, Nafissatou Diallo, is bad:

Or an immigrant housekeeper who lies about being gang-raped in Africa, tells animated tales of being nearly frog-raped in New York — then rolls around the floor, sobbing, as prosecutors try to sort fiction from fact?

A French guy and an immigrant—how do you even choose how to apportion your hate properly??? That's a toughie. Andrea Peyser is super pissed at Diallo for denying Andrea Peyser the right to know each and every kinky cum-soaked detail of what happened in that hotel room:

I wonder — did DSK ever stop for a post-sexual smoke? Or ask Diallo's name?

We'll never know. And for that, Diallo has no one to blame but herself.

Your lies denied Andrea Peyser the opportunity to sit in a courtroom and gleefully soak in sworn testimony regarding DSK's post-coital pillow talk, madam. You swine. But hey, Andrea, come on, this French guy... what, are you crying for him?

But I'm not crying for the French guy, either.

Get back on that Air France jet and soil your linens back home, Mr. Big Shot. We don't like your kind.

"Your kind" means "humanity."