Paranoid crybaby Glenn Beck is leaving Fox News, but don't you worry, world's biggest suckers Glenn Beck fans: you can still get your "giving money to Glenn Beck fix," in the form of coupons, for chocolate!

Someone must have told Glenn that Groupon is an even better hustle than shilling gold, because his production company is launching a new discount retail site, Fifty percent off chocolate? What survivalist could resist?

"As a small-business owner myself, I understand the daily challenges that entrepreneurs face and how frustrating it can be to get well-deserved attention for a great product," [Beck] said in a prepared statement.

"I have no standards of any sort," he added, very quietly.