The story of a Northwestern University professor's Hot Live Fucksaw demonstration for ten dozen rapt college students has captivated the nation and, indeed, the world. After Northwestern prez Morton Schapiro vowed to keep investigating until he got all the way to the bottom of this fucksaw business, it was time for those directly involved in the handling and care of the fucksaw in question to speak out on what really happened in there. From the owner of the fucksaw:

Students were warned of the upcoming graphic nature of our demo about a dozen times and given a chance to leave. The demo took THREE minutes and was a minimum of 30 feet away from students. Faith's privates were blocked from the audience by Jim most of the time. She was only undressed ONLY from the waist down and they got a flash from a distance-like you'd see in an R rated film. Less than what students would be exposed to with a nude model in an art class. After we were done, this led to a very productive conversation on female anatomy, orgasmic response, mechanics, orgasm types, etc. (just like the movie had discussed earlier but we felt they left out some very important points which we were addressing with this demo).

And from the wielder of the fucksaw:

"We put a condom on the toy and lubricated it, while Ken explained what we were doing. I used the device to stimulate Faith to a number of g-spot orgasms" says Jim.

But wait: Gawker commenter Titaniumbelt, who claims to have witnessed the fucksaw demo firsthand, wrote that "the woman was held down by another woman. A man on a microphone called her a slut and a whore while a fat man with a greasy ponytail went to town with the saw. They were trying to show off female ejaculation, but after five orgasms, she couldn't produce anything."

A Hot Live Fucksaw demonstration with no squirting? There's your scandal, Puritans! Less ejaculation (meaning whining vociferously), more ejaculation (of a sexual sort)!