Charlie Sheen wants a big advance for his forthcoming tell-all book. David Beckham is actually Jesus, and he has a tattoo to prove it. Some Real Housewives kicked some ass in a bar fight. It's a greedy, seedy Saturday gossip.

  • Charlie Sheen wants bidding for his tell-all book about life on the set of Two and a Half Men to start at $10 million. According to TMZ, it will be called When the Laughter Stopped and "he plans on naming names — including co-stars." Whooaa. Oh, but that's what a "tell-all" book is, anyway. Aim high, Charlie. [TMZ]
  • David Beckham revealed that he has a tattoo on his chest of himself as Jesus: "It's Jesus being carried by three cherubs and obviously the cherubs are my boys and so my thought of it is that at some point my boys are going to need to look after me and that's what they're doing in the picture." That's deep, man. [Daily Mail]
  • Teresa Giudice and Caroline Manzo from the Real Housewives of New Jersey allegedly got caught up in a "CRAZY" publicity stunt bar fight at a Hard Rock Hotel in the Dominican Republic early Wednesday morning. We're inclined to believe this only because a man apparently had a drink smashed over his head and was sent to the hospital, in true Jersey Style. [TMZ]
  • Kelsey Grammer married his fourth wife, Kayte Walsh, yesterday on the Broadway set of La Cage Aux Folles, and they held the reception at The Plaza afterward. [NYP]
  • Mötley Crüe singer Vince Neil was released from a Las Vegas jail yesterday after serving 10 very hard days of a 15-day DUI sentence. [E!]
  • "Prince" Frederic von Anhalt, husband of Zsa Zsa Gabor, has borrowed diamond jewelry worth $200,000 for the Oscars this weekend. This is the same man who's selling his ailing wife's fur coats on his website. [TMZ]