Since kids these days are already bombarded by advertising at school graduation speeches and on their school math tests, why not just go ahead and wrap their school lockers in ads, too? Good, let's do that.

They are, in Minnesota! But of course they'll be in a tasteful shade of bubblegum pink. The Star-Tribune reports that broke-ass school districts have already signed up, because, you know...fuck it, who cares.

"In the spring of next year, we'll look at the revenue stream generated and make sure it wasn't a distraction to learning," [the superintendent of a locker-ad-having school district] said. "If there are problems, we're obviously not going to continue it, but if they become kind of a normal, everyday deal, it could just be part of the culture."

It's the culture. Just give up.