Last time, on Gawker Recipes for Disaster, we made a whiskey scramble. Let's try something lighter—on the stomach and the wallet: FDA food recall salad!

In today's turbulent economy, we all want to pinch pennies. That's why we recommend keeping an eye out for food recalls: You'll be amazed at the deals you can find on everything from botulism-laced canned goods to top-grade British beef!

Today, we're going to make a delightful salad using romaine lettuce that has been recalled today because of possible E. Coli contamination. We'll top it off with a bit of goat cheese which has been pulled from the shelves due to concerns about Listeria monocytogenes, a bacteria which "can cause serious and sometimes fatal infections in young children and others with weakend immune systems." Together, they make the perfect springtime snack for entertaining, or just a quick nosh before a Broadway show.

Springtime Recall Salad

Ingredients:

3 heads, E. Coli-tainted Freshway™-brand romaine lettuce
8 oz. package, Mt. Vikos™-brand Manouri goat cheese (with Listeria monocytogenes)
4 doses, Trimethoprim-sulfamethoxazole (or your favorite Listeria monocytogene treatment)
4 doses, Questran anti-antidiarrheal medication
5 teaspoons, Newman's Own™-brand vinaigrette dressing

Preparation:
1. Gently wash romaine lettuce (Or don't; washing doesn't remove E. Coli)
2 Top liberally with crumbled goat cheese, dressing and medication
3 Enjoy!

(photo via Shutterstock)