We're just torturing starlets at this point, right? Heidi Montag gets a role in an Adam Sandler film. Corey Haim is tied to a "massive" drug ring. Padma debuts her miracle baby. Saturday gossip tickles and coos.

  • Amanda Seyfried is on a raw food diet, she tells Esquire's Tom Chiarella: "'It's intense. And sort of awful. Yesterday for lunch? Spinach. Just spinach. Spinach and seeds.' She says the last word, seeds, and leans into the long vowel sound, scrunching her nose, making the word sound like a comic discovery." These words accompany photos of Amanda cavorting in lingerie and a lace body stocking. [fig.1] She's finally become famous, but now she's not allowed to eat. Hollywood is a catch-22 like that. [Esquire]
  • Heidi Montag's new "intuitive psychic" manager has his first great success: Heidi will have a cameo in forthcoming Adam Sandler comedy Just Go With It, a.k.a. Pretend Wife. I'm guessing it'll be a sight gag about crazed plastic bimbos. Everybody's good at something. [HuffPo]
  • "An A-list crowd of Brazilian billions and supermodels rioted" because Guns n' Roses was late and Axl Rose ditched. In spite of free drinks, "the audience got angry and started to mount the stage, and fight and destroy everything." Brazilian billionaires : 2010 :: enraged American rockers : 1987 [P6]
  • Tiger Woods spent a whole week living in the same house as Elin and the kids. The real question is which bedroom he's using. Elin's twin sister convinced her to give Tiger a second chance. Every time Elin's sister comes up, the world is contractually obligated to widen its eyes and marvel, "Twins?" [TMZ]
  • The investigation into Corey Haim's death continues. California's Attorney General says Haim has been linked to an "illegal and massive prescription drug ring" that stole doctors' identities, and someone "familiar with the investigation" said they think Corey had a hand in the doctor shopping. Judy Haim may have suspected so much, and had been in the midst of a phone investigation of motherly concern. [AP] [TMZ]
  • Meanwhile, Judy Haim is soliciting donations to finance Corey's funeral. He'll be laid to rest in hometown of Toronto, and transport costs are a bitch. [E!]
  • Celebrities the kids who robbed LiLo and Paris targeted but didn't get around to robbing: Zac Efron, Miley Cyrus, Hilary Duff, Brittny Gastineau. Brittny would like to thank the Burglar Bunch for nominating her; honored is she to have her name uttered in the same context of actual famous people. [TMZ]
  • Padma Lakshmi miracle baby Krishna made her public debut. [fig.1] Like all newborns, Krishna is an indistinguishable, scrunchy-faced blob. But a cute one! [People]
  • The Feds released Joe Francis from his $33M tax lien, but then they were all, "Psyche! You still owe us $29M." They're toying with him, now. [TMZ]
  • Bruce Springsteen's daughter Jessica won a horse-jumping event. "Jessica was the only rider to go double-clear." Is Saturday gossip hit-or-miss or what. [P6]

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Figure 2.