Nuclear Wintour may be blocking SuBo from Vogue—but her motive would be pure. Rachel Uchitel gets a job, Madonna gets a new beau. Is the "oral surgery" delaying Lil' Wayne's incarceration for his grill? Wednesday gossip cometh.

  • Anna Wintour intimidated model Maggie Rizer into dying her hair red, which is kind of cliche in the wake of Coco Rocha's big red Vogue reveal. In other news, Nuclear Wintour is apparently holding out to prevent Susan Boyle from entering her magazine's hallowed pages. Anna's foil, Vogue creative director Grace Coddington, reportedly wants SuBo to "play the wicked witch in the December issue's Hansel and Gretel spectacular." A rare moment in which Wintour's "no" would be an act of kindness. [P6] [DailyStar]
  • Rachel Uchitel has finally been spit out the bottom of the tabloid power chain, and her landing place will be... a reporting gig for Extra. Apparently yesterday's interview with Mario Lopez (she called herself a "mean girl" and thought Mean Girls and Gossip Girl were sequels) "so impressed producers" she'll be a "special correspondent" on nightlife and celebrity penises, minus the penis part. [P6] [Extra]
  • After breaking with 23-year-old Brazilian model Jesus Luz, Madonna aged up a year to 24-year-old Basque model Jon Kortajarena. [fig.1] Madonna: Officially a modelizer. [SocialiteLife]
  • TMZ has Facebook-looking pictures of Snooki's new boyfriend Emilio, and holy crap, he redefines the word "meathead." The photos include him flashing speed-clad buns of steel at a bodybuilding contest, hooking his tongue ring on a Heineken bottle, and duckfacing in green body paint. (Incredible Hulk or Jolly Green Giant?) [TMZ]
  • Speaking of Jersey Shore, Vinny got a new "Sicilian themed" half-sleeve tattoo. [TMZ]
  • Lil Wayne's incarceration will be delayed so he can get a "medical necessary" "oral surgery," raising the question: Are you allowed to have grills in jail? Before he knew the delay would be approved, Lil' Wayne shot nine music videos in two days. "Unlike T.I. and some other guys [...] the point is to keep Wayne on TV and everywhere for whatever time he's in [jail]," said the director. These are the calculations you make when your livelihood depends on gangster rappers. [NYDN] [Popeater]
  • The first photo of Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady's baby reveals Benjamin Brady to be an indistinguishable squishy-faced blob, as newborns often are. [Celebitchy]
  • Marc Jacobs is sick of celebrities wasting space at his fashion shows. Last year Madonna had to crash to get in: "She came backstage and I was like, 'What do you do with her now?' Because it's not like she was invited." I admire his bitchiness, but he'd better have the goods to back it up, or the red carpet is going to rebel. [P6]
  • Michael Lohan is a deadbeat and hasn't paid child support in over a year, says Dina. Since exploiting his kids has always been Michael's chief income, paying child support turns him into the Ouroboros. [NYDN]
  • Bradley Cooper got a fake tan for the Valentine's Day premiere, but he had a beard when he did it, and then he trimmed his beard way down for the red carpet, revealing a two-tone face. [fig.2] Unless it was intentional: ombré of the face. [NYDN]
  • Captain Phil Harris, star of the Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch, died last night. He had been hospitalized for weeks—waffling in and out of medically induced coma—following a stroke during a boating expedition. He was 53 years old. [TMZ]

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