Is mustachioed hybrid-hawker Thomas Friedman licking dog food remnants from discarded cans yet? Sadly no, but he must be getting close! First his rich wife's family business went bankrupt. Now he's lost $75K. Just yesterday!

The Flat One gave a speech to the "Bay Area Air Quality Management District" last week, and charged his normal fee, $75,000, which also includes a chance for some of the attendees to ask him questions (regarding ice cream preferences only). So then a motherfucking poor media critic at the LA Times gets all pissy and starts asking questions about whether this is "good" or "fair" or whatever and then they discover hey, the NYT doesn't even let you give paid speeches to lobbying groups like that, and now Tommy has to give back the money!

Do you think Thomas Friedman likes to fly to the West Coast on an airplane and ride in a taxi and stay in a hotel, for free? That's three columns worth of material for him, but no, he does not like to do it for fucking free. Sprawling suburban mega-mansions aren't fucking free.