It turns out using Twitter will not get you laid. Actress Jennifer Aniston reportedly dumped musician John Mayer over his habit of broadcasting his every idle thought on the microblogging service. Hurray!

Aniston, already a heroic grocery-newsstand everywoman for her martyrdom at the hands of a boyfriend-stealing Angelina Jolie, has spoken out on behalf of Twitter widows everywhere. Friends of Aniston told Star that the last straw was when he claimed to be busy working, yet posted messages constantly on Twitter. Says this tabloid-quoted "friend":

Jen was fuming. There he was, telling her he didn't have time for her and yet his page was filled with Twitter updates. Every few hours, sometimes minutes, he'd update with some stupid line. And in her mind, she was like "He has time for all this Twittering, but he can't send me a text, an email, make a call?"

On the bright side, Mayer has permission to approach Shaq, a fellow citizen of Twitteronia, at any moment.

(Photo via E Online)