If there's one thing we know, it's that readers could not possibly, under any circumstances, care less about any "award" a media outlet receives. Ladies and gentlemen, your 2009 National Magazine Awards nominees are here:

The New Yorker, as is its wont, got the most nominations (10). This is because The New Yorker is America's best magazine. Next were GQ (8 nominations), New York (6), and Esquire and National Geographic with five each.

Bon Appetit, the NYT mag, and Wired each got four nominations, okay? You can fill in the list of likely suspects who got three or two or even one. In what must be an attempt to help Bon Appetit and Gourmet not fold, ASME bizarrely notes in its press release:

• Food-related magazines, stories and websites captured 12 nominations across nine categories, including General Excellence, Single-topic Issue and Photography

Okay! No huge surprises. You can read the long, long list of nominees here. The award ceremony is on April 20. Last year we went and still ran into Julia Allison, so we may skip 'em this year, unless you, our loyal readers, want us to go, then we will, because we don't need your stupid awards to be happy, ASME, we don't even care that we weren't nominated while Salon.com was. That's fine.