A dead body encased in solid ice for who knows how long was found—with only the feet sticking out—in an elevator shaft in a warehouse. In Detroit, obviously. By a reporter. One we know!

Before calling the police, this reporter went to check on the tip, skeptical of a hoax. Sure enough, in the well of the cargo elevator, two feet jutted out above the ice. Closer inspection revealed that the rest of the body was encased in 2-3 feet of ice, the body prostrate, suspended into the ice like a porpoising walrus.

Stories like this only happen to former NYT bad boy reporter turned gritty Detroit News scribe Charlie LeDuff! Not only did he find the icy dead man, he went back to ask all the homeless guys who live in the warehouse why they didn't call the cops. They responded in the way that homeless guys do, in movies about reporters interviewing homeless guys in Detroit:

He was asked if he called the police.

"No, I thought it was a dummy myself," he said unconvincingly. Besides, Williams said, there were more pressing issues like keeping warm and finding something to eat.

"You got a couple bucks?" he asked.

It does not get grittier than that, friends. If only LeDuff could find some gritty emergency worker to read from the script of the same movie:

After another two calls to 911 on Wednesday afternoon (one of which was disconnected), the Detroit Fire Department called and agreed to meet nearby.

Capt. Emma McDonald was on the scene.

"Every time I think I've seen it all, I see this," she said.

And with that they went about the work of recovering a person who might otherwise be waiting for the warm winds of spring.

[Detroit News]