In your pleasant Thursday media column: Jay Mariotti is an asshole, Teens can't read, checks are bouncing, and more:

A sad day for teen literary types: TEEN magazine and its website have been shuttered by Hearst. Seventeen will continue to publish. Kids aged 13-16 will have to read it aspirationally instead; Kids aged 18-19 will have to read it and regress. [WWD]

Phenomenally unpopular Chicago sports columnist Jay Mariotti, who ankled the Sun-Times recently in order to find some job on the internet, for some reason, defends himself for treating his newspaper like a jerk: "It's my life, not theirs. I wrote 5,000 columns for them in 17 years. I wrote on holidays, spent massive amounts of time away from home. Roger Ebert, whom I've met once, can kiss my ass. No one gave more blood to that place than I did, and if I decide it's going to die an imminent death, it's my call." Roger Ebert is a jawless, voiceless cancer victim. CLASSY. []

The NYT goes in depth about The Printed Blog, the new startup that will print blog posts up into newspaper form and sell ads on them. It's still a dumb idea.

NBC is hiring a "global marketing firm" to "reposition" its brand. Smart. Those types of firms are always led by real talent that does great work at reasonable prices. [Variety]

"Nearly a dozen Star Tribune employees who took the company's buyout money learned last night that their five-figure checks will bounce if cashed." That is how media executives end up with boxes of poop. [MinnPost]