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• Madonna is taking her kids on the best summer vacation ever later this month: She's thinking about taking them to visit Auschwitz, so "they can learn about mistakes made in the past." If that doesn't pan out, she could always just invite Sean Penn and Guy Ritchie over for a visit and teach them the same lesson, couldn't she? [YNET]
• Paula Abdul announced over Twitter last night that she's leaving American Idol. True? Was she just drinking again? We'll find out soon enough. [NYDN]
• Hopeless romantic Kelly Bensimon made a move on Gerard Butler the other night, but the actor didn't reciprocate. Try your best to empathize. [NYDN]
• Great news: Ratings for Jon & Kate Plus 8 have tanked since the show came back from hiatus. Say a little prayer that this continues. [Us]
• Nominations for the MTV Video Music Awards were announced yesterday; Beyoncé and Lady Gaga came out on top, each earning nine nods. [THR]

• Contrary to the rumors, John Mayer and Jessica Simpson did not hook up last week. Just in case you'd been getting your hopes up or whatever. [People]
Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez went to the same restaurant the other night and didn't even say hello to one another! The horror! [P6]
Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black is suing for $3 million over the X-rated photos that were posted of him and a former boyfriend. [P6]
• Chris Brown will be officially sentenced today. [AP]
• Ryan O'Neal's eldest son Griffin says his dad "destroyed his life" by giving him cocaine when he was just 11. You mean, that's a bad thing? [DM]
Naomi Campbell snatched a mic away from Jennifer Lopez and subjected everyone to a karaoke performance at a club in Capri, if you believe what the ever reliable Sun has to say today. [Sun]
Twilight author Stephenie Meyer has been sued for plagiarism. [NYDN]
Ashley Olsen says she's surprised she didn't end up like Britney Spears. Funny, we say the same thing to ourselves every morning, too. [NYDN]
• Lauren Conrad and Kim Kardashian will make appearances on the new season of America's Next Top Model. How exciting. [Us]
• "Real Housewife" Bethenny Frankel always insists on speaking the absolute truth. But you probably knew that already, didn't you. [NYM]
Tommy Hilfiger and wife had a son yesterday. [People]
• Want to take a trip to the bathroom with Courtney Love? On ya go. [NYM]