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At a fundraising lunch in Richmond, Virginia yesterday, John McCain joked, "Basically, I did a Google" when researching possible vice presidential candidates. One would hope a campaign with nine-figure funding would be able to hire people more familiar with Internet technology to do it for him, lest TechCrunch reconsider its endorsement. Just imagine the dirty tricks search-engine optimizers could pull!

Forget Googling. If we were campaign strategists, we'd be doing plenty of old-school dumpster diving and pretexting to make sure potential candidates hadn't, say, undergone shock therapy, developed a taste for hookers and blow, or conducted adulterous affairs with Google CEO Eric Schmidt. Certainly explains why former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina is a Republican Party adviser and possible McCain running mate, doesn't it? (Photo by AP/Charles Dharapak)