It comes as no great surprise that not every single bit of unhinged essayist David Sedaris's essays are true. But they are mostly true, Sedaris says—enough to be filed under nonfiction at the bookstore, anyway. WRONG, says Barnes & Noble. "Apparently Barnes & Noble doesn't care what Mr. Sedaris thinks: an official chart distributed to publishers that shows sales figures for the week ending 06/23 defiantly has Mr. Sedaris's new book, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, listed under "Adult Fiction Hardcover." [NY Observer] If that wasn't bad enough, our lovely commenter tribalpottery chimes in to tell us the details of Sedaris's alleged cruise-y freakiness at a book reading:

A couple of years ago he did a reading here in LA. Most of the audience was composed of the liberal, NPR types, women you volunteer for pledge drives, and the gays. He was asking for this blond twink's number who was legal but definitely under twenty-one. Sedaris wouldn't take no for an answer. So my friend and I get to the head of the line. He asks if our relationship is open. We say we're only friends. Sedaris asks if we "play" together. I thought he was kidding. He was creepy.

Also... there was a time where "This American Life" I believed taped at UCLA's Royce Hall. Again, it was a few years ago. I wasn't there but my friend was hit on by him. Sedaris came up with a line saying who was the biggest celebrity to hit on him. Then, the author said who was the most recent. He then gave my friend the name of his hotel and room number.

Luckily Sedaris doesn't use the Internet so I don't need to worry about an angry email from him later tonight.