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Marc Jacobs: former addict turned narcissistic gym-goer. That's the takeaway from GQ's new profile of the ubiquitous fashion designer, and perhaps that's exactly what one should expect. He's really good friends with his personal trainer! He has a tattoo of SpongeBob! He had a bad childhood! But now he's fabulous and not on drugs and working out at the David Barton Gym for hours before peacocking around town! The real lesson here is that if you write about fashion designers like Marc Jacobs, you're working with a limited palette from the start. But we'll fill you in on the specifics—including his mom's bad taste, his own self-loathing, and his friendship with "Easy," after the jump.

Marc Jacobs had a bad childhood, his dad died, and his mother had a poor sense of style.

"I hate the term 'bad taste,' but my mother wasn't, like, a very chic person," he says. "Jane Fonda in Klute was definitely one of her role models, much to my father's dismay. But when I'd watch my mother getting dressed up to go out on dates and she'd be putting on three rows of false eyelashes and some hideous fox-trimmed brocade coat with a wet-look miniskirt and knee-high boots, I thought she was fabulous."

He doesn't talk to her any more. If he did, they would probably have to talk about working out, because that is what Marc Jacobs talks about. His trainer Easy is now his main man.

By the time they met, Jacobs was already dieting. "I never saw the bigger Marc," Easy says, behind aviator shades etched with mj, a Louis Vuitton gym bag at his feet.

"The fat guy that I kicked?" says Jacobs.

"The fat guy that we'd beat up if we saw him on the street," Easy laughs.

"The soft, blubbery Marc Jacobs," says Marc Jacobs.

Ha, screw your old self! But Easy is more than just a friend; he's a dawg.

Easy hesitates, then offers his wrist, which boasts a gold Rolex—a birthday present from Jacobs. On the back, it's inscribed love you dawg, mj. "I'm really proud of it," Easy says quietly.

As well you should be. At the end, Marc Jacobs sums up the philosophy that has enabled him to become a millionaire and worldwide celebrity:

"It's like saying, 'I want to look hot.' That is such a dumb thing to say," Jacobs notes. "But what's so cool about it is that you can say it. Yeah, I want a bunch of muscle queens at David Barton Gym to think that my body looks dope."

[pic via Arena Homme]