Here's a late update on the horrific story that's been riveting our city's leading citizens for close to half a year now: CW11 News at 10 anchoress Kaity Tong remains homeless after being chased out of her Chelsea duplex in July by some sort of killer toxic mold unleashed by the ongoing condo conversion of the O'Neill Building next door. Tong—who's persevered over the decades as the classy, saucy jewel of New York's local-news crown, even through such trying times as the traffic-helicopter arms race of the mid-90s and the "my Doppler is doper than yours" weather wars of the late-90s—has been forced to bunk down with husband Patrick Callahan in a $600-a-night room at the Gramercy Park Hotel. Which, needless to say, is no place for this foxiest of fourth-estate cougars!
Indeed, Kaity's despondency is growing thicker than her trademark eyeliner: "I never thought that I'd be living like this," she told the Post last Friday. "My son can't come home from college for Thanksgiving because there's no place for him to stay. And my dog [a Siberian husky] has been in a kennel and will probably remain there through Christmas." And what happens come winter break? Does the son go to the kennel as well?
The real scandal here, of course, is the total lack of Christian charity exhibited by the rest of the Big Apple's TelePrompTer mafia—it's past time someone calls them out for refusing to offer Tong shelter even as they berate us night after night with feel-good tales about 10-year-old soup-kitchen volunteers, or the rat droppings found at our favorite delis, or sports bloopers. Understandably, Kaity's Channel 11 colleagues shouldn't be counted on for much: co-anchor Jim Watkins is a vapid, vacuous shell of a haircut; man–boy correspondent Arthur Chi'en is a potty-mouthed lunatic; and ageless meteorologist Mr. (O.) G.'s nightly flapping of his bizarrely winglike left elbow suggests deep psychological trauma of his own.
But the silence from the other stations' "personalities" is pretty close to unconscionable. Surely, Channel 4's Chuck Scarborough, now riding high with his own 7 P.M. newscast that is almost, almost like making it to the Network big leagues, has a guest room or two to spare for a toxic mold refugee? And what of Channel 5's Ernie Anastos, Kaity's TV husband from 1984 to 1986, who's in the middle of a $10 million deal to host a whiz-bang 10-o'clock broadcast that takes at least two good doses of Dramamine to get through? No need to rely on the males, either: Channel 2's Dana Tyler, so shamelessly shacking it up with Phil Collins, must have an open pied-à-terre to lend the Tong–Callahans.
Oh, more names can be named: Sue Simmons; Diana Williams; Bill Ritter: gravitas begins at home, folks, and Kaity Tong is without one! Shameful! Anchors without moral anchor: Bill Beutel would have never stood for this.