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The Z-List celebrity dance competition world was thrown for a loop yesterday when Marie Osmond collapsed on live TV following a performance on Dancing with the Stars: It was a shocking turn of events that elicited gasps from the audience, if not a few snickers of derision from overzealous competitors, at least one of whom was overheard to have said, "Geez, my mother died and yet I still managed to keep it together. Looks like the pressure's finally getting to someone. Team Seymour!" A round-up:
· Marie describes what it feels like to survive a post-Samba, nowhere-near-death experience: "I wasn't quite sure what was going on and then I saw everybody. I saw my kids, I saw TOM [BERGERON] and I think I said, 'Oh, crap!'" [ETOnline]
· Brother Donny helpfully speculates on some of the external factors that might have contributed to Marie's loss-of-consciousness! Health scare! Tragedy!: "Marie is touring, she has 8 children and went through a divorce." If we had 8 sets of crushed eyes staring down at us after falling off the reality TV gravy-train, we might say, "Oh, crap" too. [ETOnline]

· Marie's partner Jonathan Roberts knew something was wrong halfway through the performance, as Osmond's breath was catching, she was missing steps, and she never once whispered, "C'mon, let's bring that big, shiny disco ball home for mama. Waddaya say, Jonny m'boy?!" into his ear during the performance. [ExtraTV]
· "She's OK, she just doesn't breathe," says Osmond's publicist, just one vital human function off from the, "She's OK, she just doesn't eat" statement the flack typically issues on behalf of younger starlet clients. []