This image was lost some time after publication.

It seems like we only manage to check in with Nicolas Cage under extremely weird circumstances, like Transylvanian real estate transactions and visits to Japanese cooking shows, so it's with a measure of relief that we bring you the comparatively mundane story of the naked guy he found prancing around his house in one of his leather jackets:

No one was hurt in the incident, which happened early on Monday in Newport Beach, an upscale community 45 miles south of Los Angeles. Cage, who was at home with his wife and child, asked the intruder to remove the jacket, escorted him outside and called a security guard.

Robert Dennis Furo Jr., 45, pleaded not guilty on Tuesday to a first-degree burglary charge. He was ordered back to court on October 10 for a pretrial hearing.

Newport Beach police Lt. Craig Fox said Furo was "apparently" naked, and not known to Cage. There was no sign of a break-in, and he did not know what led Furo to Cage's home.

We were tempted to make a too-easy crack about Cage putting on his bear attack suit before swatting the nude intruder, but then thought better of it, as the actor appears to have handled himself admirably throughout the nervewracking experience. He even went so far as to offer Furo a pair of unused Superman tights to slip into while they waited for the police to arrive—a far less injurious proposition than the junk-piercing potential of the spiked epaulets on the Ghost Rider bikerwear collection.