As noted philosopher Carrie Bradshaw once put it, the New York Times wedding announcements are "the straight woman's sports pages." Altarcations is all about scoring the game. Each week, we evaluate the latest newlyweds, based on an elaborate rating system, described below.

We tend to be less than impressed with the couples featured in the main Styles "Vows" story. The bride's usually an ex-Rockette and the groom's like a blind rabbi or something. This week's column was an aberration! Sara Galvin and Luke Bronin are basically perfect. Rhodes Scholars who went on to attend Yale Law School, their courtship included boat-rides down the Thames, croquet games, and a road-trip in which they spoke of their dreams of contributing to society in a meaningful way. But it rained at their wedding. Ha! What's more, they went toe to toe in rough competition with a sterling crowd!

Sara Galvan, Luke Bronin: 23 big points!

  • Couple featured in "Vows" section: +2
  • Sara and Luke were both Rhodes Scholars: +6
  • "I spoke to her of my dreams of changing American cities through urban design," said Ms. Galvan, who trained as an architect at the University of Texas. "He spoke of his dream of contributing to society through policy work and politics.": +3
  • "They began dating in earnest in March of their second year, traveling down the Thames in flat-bottomed boats, playing croquet and traveling to South Africa, Eastern Europe and the Balkans.": +3
  • Luke graduated from Yale: +2
  • Both received law degrees from Yale: +7
  • Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
  • Rained at wedding: -1
  • Emily Thacher-Renshaw, Christian Pistilli: 17 points
  • Couple both graduated from Harvard Law School: +7 (5 for both going to Harvard, 1 each for graduate degree)
  • Emily graduated cum laude from HLS: +1
  • Christian graduated magna cum laude from HLS: +2
  • Emily graduated magna cum laude from Penn: +3
  • Christian graduated summa cum laude from Haverford: +3
  • Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
  • Juliet Sorce, David Weber: 12 points
  • Juliet's parents are "of Manhattan": +1
  • Couple met at Yale during their freshman year: +7 (5 for both attending Yale, 2 for meeting during freshman year)
  • Couple got married at the Yale Club: +2
  • Juliet received a MA in Italian language and culture from Middlebury: +1
  • David owns Rickshaw Dumpling Bar: +1
  • Mimi van Wyck, Ham Morrison: 12 points
  • Mimi van Wyck is the brother of socialite, event planner Bronson van Wyck: +2
  • Ham's name is Ham: +2
  • He's a III: +2
  • His mother is named Kiwi: +2
  • Mimi is a partner in Van Wyck & Van Wyck, a company founded by her mother and brother: +2
  • Ham is a real estate investor and also races stock cars: +2
  • Our patented rating system:
  • Investment banker: +2
    Both Investment bankers: +5
    Job involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +1
    Both have jobs involving the word "banker" OR "investment": +3
    Management Consultant: +1
    Both management consultants: +3
    Trader: +2
    Both traders: +5
    Corporate lawyer: +2
    Both corporate lawyers: +5
    Works for Defense Department: +2
    Doctor: +2
    Both doctors: +5
    Teacher at a New York City or Connecticut private school: 2
    Parents from New York City or wealthy suburb in Connecticut: 1
    New York Times employee: +1
    State Department employee: +2
    Bride is an elementary school teacher: +1
    Works in media: +1
    Ivy league graduate: +1 *
    Both ivy league graduates: +3
    Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +2*
    Both Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Oxford, Cambridge, Sorbonne: +5*
    For each subsequent degree after a B.A.: +1
    Ivy league B.A. with graduate degree at low-ranking local
    college/university: -1
    If bride or groom attended/teach at any school with "Country Day" in
    the name: +2
    Coro fellow at NYU Law: +1
    Has MFA in creative writing from University of Iowa: +1
    Graduated Cum Laude: +1
    Graduated Magna Cum Laude: +2
    Graduated Summa Cum Laude: +3
    Fulbright fellow: +2
    Rhodes scholar: +3
    Couple met online: -1
    Couple met at art opening: 2
    Couple met at art opening for husband's/wife's show: +3
    Woman is at ideal age for getting married (25): 1
    Man is at ideal age for getting married (27): 1
    For each member of couple over 35: -1
    Couple married by a Cantor: +1
    Couple met during or before their freshman year in college: +2
    Bride or groom goes by middle name: +1
    Mother a nursery school/kindergarten teacher or reading
    specialist/father is a wealthy professional= +3
    If the groom is Jewish and the bride Asian: +2
    If the groom is Asian and the bride is Jewish: -1
    The bride/bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce: -2
    Descendant/related to somebody famous: +3
    Descendant of a founding father: +4
    Groom wearing gingham in picture: +1
    Parent is a trustee or board member of a company or organization: +1
    per company/org
    Parent is a member of the Bermuda parliament: +2
    Bride or Groom is a board member of a company or organization: +1 per
    Bride "is keeping her name", "will continue to use her name professionally": -1
    If there is a Jr., II, III or IV in a name: +2
    If there is a "von" in a last name: +2
    Couple featured in "Vows" column: +2
    Bride or groom's first name is a made-up preppy name: +3
    If someone famous comes to the wedding and is mentioned: +2
    If wedding ceremony held at Bethesda by the Sea in Palm Beach, and/or
    reception under a tent at the bride's grandmother's house in P.B: +2
    Bride clearly quits her job after the wedding: +1
    Married by an Episcopal priest: +1
    Groom is 15-30 years older than bride: +3
    Bride and groom both from New Jersey: -2
    Partner in corporate law firm: +3
    Bridge teaches elementary school, groom in finance: +2
    Bride works for auction house, groom in finance: +2
    Bride/groom works for company founded by parents: +2
    Bride/groom related to a socialite: +2
    *Apply to graduate school degrees in addition to B.A.s