"If my 20-year-old self could see me now at 35, he'd want to kick my ass," says Dan Peres in the opening of his Letter From The Editor in the current Details. It's the yuppie issue, and Dan wants you to know that while he used to be pretty cool (smoked pot, wore flannel, lived in the Village), he's grown and changed, and now he's the kind of douche that he used to despise. He lets you know this in painful, painstaking detail. Since the piece is not online, and God knows you don't want anyone to see you actually buying Details we've taken the liberty of reproducing it below. It's a long read, but ultimately worth it, because, as Dan comes to terms with his own douchery, so must we all. Enjoy.

This image was lost some time after publication.