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We're a little more fuzzy than usual right now, having just awoken from the most fantastic dream. We can't remember all of the details, but it took place in the near future — perhaps even this week — and we were just plugging along through these stereotypical dog days, praying for a picture of Suri or a date with Jared Kushner (our subconscious wanderings are very realistic). Then the dream got really, really random: grizzled Page Six reporter Chris Wilson had announced, of all things, that he was taking a new job. Going somewhere for more money (maybe Radar, maybe Southern Living?), maybe going sooner rather than later because, despite whatever retractions, he's still the prime suspect in leaking word of bossman Richard Johnson's DUI. We can't remember all the details but, whatever the backstory, we clearly dreamed that Wilson was leaving P6. Like, leaving now.

Totally weird, completely crazy and utterly nonsensical, right? We should probably lay off the codeine nightcaps.