New York mag's Carl Swanson and Nerve editor Will Doig try their hardest to look only at Deborah Schoeneman's face.
On Friday night, socialites Boykin Curry and Celerie Kemble hosted the book party for Deborah Schoeneman's 4% Famous, her thinly veiled account of life as a gossip slave. Because you are only as good as your condos, the party was held on Curry's terrace high atop Central Park south, in a building more gilded than Dubai — a perfect setting for a novel about underpaid, professional alcoholics. After the jump, lovely photographer Blaise Kearsley captures media whores and Moby.
Deborah's parents, Sandy and Morris Schoeneman (above), never read gossip columns. Sandy says, "I told [Deborah] not to marry anyone too glitzy or too handsome." This motherly advice would explain why Deborah dated Rocco DiSpirito and gallavants with Moby.
They'll never admit it, not even to each other, but none of these people have actually read the book.
New York mag features editor Jared Hohlt will soon finish his own roman-a-clef, a sordid tale of an Approval Matrix gone wrong.
In an effort to protect Anchovie the dog, wee Sadie Kargman lunges for Moby.
Schoeneman's team, publicist Sarah Chance, hostess Celerie Kemble, and agent David Halpern, discuss their next plan of attack: shellfish at Milos.
Julia Stiles was scheduled to attend, but she backed out at the last minute. Fortunately, this guy made it. Thanks, guy!
Deborah sells books by any means necessary.
ABC correspondent Dan Harris came to the party with his girlfriend Fernanda Niven, but she doesn't like being photographed (her father is Sotheby's auctioneer Jamie Niven and her grandfather is actor David Niven, as if that's any excuse).
Did you expect this shit to be sponsored by Twinings?
Real estate mogul Don and Vivian Resnicoff (parents of Deborah's boyfriend) discuss dowry with Morris Schoeneman.
Ted Roosevelt and Serena Torrey are far more pretty than you. Don't worry, they know it.
New York senior editor Carl Swanson edits his best attempt at a "gossip" column, though he knows it won't translate into a very interesting book.