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No, that eerie hush you noticed on your commute into the office was not your imagination. It was the stunned silence of a city in mourning Kimberly Stewart and Talan Torriero have officially called off their fake engagement:

"It was just too soon to enter into a lifelong commitment," their representatives said in a joint statement. "It is better to have a brief engagement than a short marriage. The couple continue to share their time together and remain open to whatever the future may hold."

We know, we know, it's hard, but they need us more than ever right now. Resist the urge to panic about who gets custody of the Xbox that's what lawyers are for. Instead of focusing on the failure, focus on what was accomplished: two famous-for-being-marginally-famous non-talents perpetuating a cynical, self-serving PR scam that in just ten days managed to dwarf media coverage of the war in Iraq. Their's was the fake-love mass-opiate that melted all of our hearts, particularly Star Magazine's, who once again seems to be in a state of celebrity break up denial.