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LA Times gets all A1 with its hipster coverage, burning your cornea with a major piece on party photographer The Cobra Snake. Bonus points for New Yorkers Joey Arak and Choire McSichapants for quotage, and to Jonny Kaps for having his name repeatedly misspelled. [LAT]
• So who's going to replace legendary King of All Media Howard Stern? Worst case scenario: Adam Carrolla or David Lee Roth. Time to buy an iPod if you haven't already. [CBS/AP]
• In other replacement news, cheap retalier has replaced Cocaine Kate Moss with Italian model Mariacarla Boscano, who we're sure has never blown a rail in her entire life. [Yahoo/AP]
• Fundamentalist Christians get laid more than you think. [NYT]
• Manhattan, meet the ViVa 'hood. That's right: The next neighborhood to try and get all "hot" is named after your budget paper towels. [Curbed]