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Last night's party celebrating the new issue of Heeb had all the ingredients of a potentially historic Gawker Team Party Crash: Jews, Media, Sex. It's the Holy Trinity of our existence — and so we decided to send Jewish, mediocre, and undersexed Gawker mascot Andrew Krucoff, along with gentile photog Nikola Tamindzic, to the LES shtetl to document this simcha.

It was a bad idea. We'll let Kruc — who had a nice shtick planned, a whole cheap-Jews theme — explain:

Budget Living, the shelter/shopping/lifestyle mag for the heeb in everyone, held its third-anniversary party at the Hotel QT last night, and it presented the perfect, parsimonious warm-up for the evening. You could feel that heat as WWD's Jeff Bercovici was seen running around the joint like a pool boy with a sack of towels on shoulder. Everyone's favorite media lifeguard, Greg Lindsay, offered a quick hi/goodbye and declined to comment on his Mediabistro EIC candidacy. But then we were told this was largely a business-side party, and we don't co-mingle well with ad sales people, so we left. Real fast.

Next stop on the Gawker-Jewker Tour Bus was the main event: Heeb's Sex issue party on the Lower East Side. We had high hopes of lulav'd-and-etrog'd Succot sex in a breezy hut atop a tenement, but all we got were 200 Jews in the proverbial VW Bug of an open bar. Too packed, too hairy, and not worth scrounging for loose change, so we called Nikola and told him not to bother, and then we left. Even faster.

It's a good issue, though. And, TMFTML nothwitstanding, we dig poking holes at the Sarah Silverman shot on the cover.

The Sex Issue [Heeb]