• Men's Journal editor Michael Caruso leaves the mag, and now Wenner honcho Kent Brownridge wants to turn it into The New Yorker.
• TomKitten is imminent, which confuses the nation for many, many reasons.
• Please do not touch the U2.
• The rich are different from you and me: The get tipped to terror warnings first.
• No one goes to The Magician anymore; it's too crowded.
• Founding Men's Health editor Mike Lafavore doesn't like current Men's Health editor Dave Zinczenko any more than we do.
• Lizzie Grubman's PoweR Girls to return to a TV near you. Which will, one hopes, be tuned to a different channel.
• Cocaine is cheaper than it's ever been, and let us just tell you that we think that's really great because it was crazy to spend so much money on drugs all the time, especially because you never know when you bought it whether it was going to be good shit or not, and while it's probably worth it — OK, fine, so fucking worth it, man, you know? — to shell out for nice blow, you know, where you can feel it in your teeth and your forearms and — are you feeling it yet? — it just fucking sucks to sit at home and wait for the guy to get here, which, you know, always takes him longer than he says it's going to, and waste all that cash, just to end up with some baking soda or whatever, but, in this case, we didn't get screwed (right?) and — hey, could you pass that mirror over this way again?
• We atoned, and Jesus lives.