A beautiful thing happened on Thursday morning. The Drudge Report threw up a giant headline, “SIGN UP: 1-800-FUCKYO,” beneath a Photoshopped picture of Barack Obama holding the bell of a stethoscope. The headline linked to a Daily Caller item, published several hours prior, about Healthcare.gov’s toll-free hotline, which is 1-800-318-2596. These numbers, associate editor Katie McHugh wrote, correspond to 1-800-FUCKYO. Sort of.

Need health insurance? The Obama administration has you covered. Simply dial 1-800-FUCKYO to reach the next available health-care provider. ...

1-800-3(F) 8(U) 2(C) 5(K) 9(Y) 6(O).

That’s 1-800-FUCKYO.

Here is an exquisite artifact of conservative journalism: a free-floating anti-Obama meme so removed from anything resembling reality that even its author openly admits it’s untrue:

Sadly, the Obama administration failed to swap the useless 1 for a more functional 8 to complete the heartfelt message, perhaps in consolation to former White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel’s tragically shortened middle finger.

So, in fact, the number corresponds to: 1-800-F1U-CKYO. Dialing 1-800-FUCKYO would not, as the item’s second sentence claims, connect the dialer to a Healthcare.gov operator. It wouldn’t connect to anything, because FUCKYO isn’t even seven characters long. (Dialing 1-800-FUCK-YOU, which is reportedly a sex line, currently gets you a busy signal, thanks to the Daily Caller and Drudge.)

Given that each phone button offers a choice of three or four letters, the real number could also be used to spell out 1-D1VA-KY-6.

The sequence wasn’t even chosen by the current administration: According to Nexis, 1-800-318-2596 was originally used for a Medicare hotline in 1999.


If you have any questions about the Affordable Care Act, call 1-800-318-2596.

If you have questions about The Daily Caller’s editorial decision-making, call 1-C0CK-0N-B0AR.