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Sands of Time
Jenny G. Zhang

Don’t Worry, Aaron Rodgers Consulted Joe Rogan About Not Getting Vaccinated

Great minds think alike

Punt This
Jenny G. Zhang

Celebrity Divorce Watch: Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott

Unfortunately massive credit card debt can’t keep them together

90210
Allie Jones

Dunkin Donuts Must Release Larger Hashbrown Portions

I’m tired of ordering three.

demands
Kelly Conaboy

Peloton Finally Releases Its Muscled Grip on the World as Bike and Treadmill Sales Fall

Time to release another advertisement

Sorry, Cody
Jenny G. Zhang

Sally Rooney Inspires Israeli Bookstores to Do BDS on Themselves

Much like everyone else, they’re mad about the Irish millennial novelist

ROOINOUS
Tarpley Hitt

High School Football Team Loses 106-0, Learns Important Lesson About Comedy

Thank you to the Morningside high school football team for their hilarious sacrifice.

touchdown
Kelly Conaboy

I Can't Burp

I am not alone in this predicament.

It Hasn't Happened to Me
Justin Cox

Dave Portnoy Is a Piece of Shit

Business Insider reported several allegations of disturbing behavior with much younger women

STOOL
Tarpley Hitt

Queen Elizabeth, Cheater of Death, Turns Back Time With Army of Clock Guardians

Tick tock bitch

Time's Up
Jenny G. Zhang

Remember When Michael Bay Made a Milk Commercial

It was a good one

Lactaid
Leah Finnegan

Jameela Jamil to Herself: Kiss My Ass!

She continues to inspire

munch-ass-en
Claire Carusillo

Multiple Bon Appétit Alums Are Selling Shirts With Beans On Them

Say it with your chest

Beancore
Tammie Teclemariam

James Carville: Has the Left Considered Moving to the Right?

The wizened pundit prays for Democrats to “go to a woke detox center”

Cajun Style
Jenny G. Zhang

Teigen Tales: Chrissy Teigen Shares Some Thoughts on Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson

With a TMZ cameraman

Big Chrissy Energy
Allie Jones

Bravo's Lisa Vanderpump Argues Against Raising Minimum Wage for Employees

The former 'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' star owns several restaurants in West Hollywood.

sexy unique poverty
Kelly Conaboy