Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals - Gawker Comments

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

TroubleonWheels — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 18:14:05 EST

Thank you ever so for extending and deepening my seasonal depression.

My antidote, which I call the "Jolly Trouble"

equal parts Applejack, DiSaronno, and cranberry juice. On the rocks, shaken and strained into a martini glass with a maraschino, as a chilled shot, or (my preferred way) combined with Veuve Cliquot in a Super Big Gulp cup.

TroubleonWheels

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

Gravy Train — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 15:16:11 EST

TedSez is almost right. Factor in that either the agent, the editor, the author, or Keith Kelly likely lied about the advance and that depending on the tax bracket, the author then likely gave 20-30% of the one-third actually paid out to the government and that bonzana begins to look like a streaming pile of bull pucks.

Gravy Train

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

fireboy — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 14:39:50 EST

I usually really enjoy this series, but this installment sounds like it was written by "The New Guy".

fireboy

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

elvis sighting — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 14:37:52 EST

If Unsolicited had an editor he/she might offer notes like, "Uninspired. Unimaginative. Unnecessary. Unsaleable."
Or, if said editor had more facility with words than Unsolicited, perhaps "Insipid."

elvis sighting

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

TedSez — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 13:26:16 EST

Of course, a writer who gets a "six-figure advance" of $100,000 is only paid a third of that up front, 15 percent of which goes to the agent. Which means he or she actually receives $28,000 for sustenance over the months or years during which the book has to be written. And that's what they call a "bonanza"!

TedSez

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

Redondo Dubonnet — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 13:02:31 EST

I don't know what Gollum of a "veteran" wrote that load of shit, but it actually tore me away from watching the turdly coverage of Gerald Ford's death on Deathvision.

God, I know, it's JUST A BUSINESS! And like this boob veteran of the page-turning wars, good shit just doesn't come along much! And actually we former big shots are fucking smart!

And I just have to say that when you spend lots of time talking to TV people in LA, all of whom went to Emerson College and can't spell, but are making all the key decisions, it really gives you perspective on the pu-pu-publishing business. Yup, they're stupid in TV, but nobody is more arrogant, ignorant, self-aggrandizing, self-validating and fucking dumb than publishers.

Thanks so much for that illuminating essay. The next time my agent tells me "that's your mishegos", I'll keep it in mind.

Redondo Dubonnet

Unsolicited: In Defense Of Big Dumb Deals

heartbreakturnip — Wed, 27 Dec 2006 13:01:12 EST

A business? You don't say.

I believe "Unsolicited" has just outed itself as a publishing newbie. To whit: actually reading "Deal Lunch"; still impressed by six-figure deals; mistaking "workshop-attending, literary magazine-courting, MFA-garnering" for "talented"; mistaking a P&L for anything but a work of fiction; and believing in the old, hoary myth that blockbusters and bestsellers support anything but themselves and those authors.

If you're not making seven-figure advances, you're a piker and should go home to Who?ville.

heartbreakturnip