"You" suck.

We should take a moment to congratulate the producers, writers, designers, gaffers, and everyone else over at TasteTV for this fantastic achievement.

You know, just to save Kevin the trouble.

Does this mean the issue's cover is just going to be a mirror? 'Cause I already have one of those.

I highly recommend watching the section of This Week with George Stephanopoulos that had Rick Stengel on the roundtable. He was defending the choice of "You" as the POTY and I'm pretty sure George Will wanted to punch him in the face.

Fuck "You".

Since Time is down with the kids an' all, shouldn't that be 'U'?

I'm am so over You.

Doesn't this just mean "the computer" won again?

They missed the option of placing a tiny mirror under the word "you", so that you could understand how deeply and profoundly their 'ideas' are retarded by the fetal alcohol syndrome they so obviously have. And so that Time can collectively suck the cock of their 28 frillion American readers. And also, so that we could finally live out our fantasy of railing off of Time Magazine.

I'm off to find "Man in the Mirror" in my iTunes so I can ponder.

And also, Tom Friedman - poster child for intellectual palsy - will be spontaneously ejaculating on the CEOs of Indian computer corporations for the next 17 hours. Enjoy your day!

How long until some Yale undergrad lists this on his resume?

Does You have a MySpace page?

The funniest part is, if you click on the link to the article, you must first be subjected to a car ad with the tag line, "You might not be POTY, but you you can drive like one." I'm like, wait a second, I AM the POTY! It says so right there.

It's official, there are no more important people left. They did slap a cheap reflective surface on the computer screen of the cover, btw. Good for a laugh, not so much for blow.

lucky for me, I'm Atoosa Rubenstein

Does this mean every human is now POTY, or just the ones that read Time? If the former, I hope they don't have any multi-year winner restrictions, because that would pretty much screw them from now on.

I would just like to thank everyone who voted for Me.

I'm glad my contributions are finally being recognized.

That's it: the "Time Man of the Year" issue is now irrelevant. This would be like Sports Illustrated running a swimsuit issue featuring poodles dressed in doggie bathing suits.

Chill out, people. Is there anything/body Time could have picked that you wouldn't have mocked mercilessly with your "snark" and "wit"?

He's just not that into You.

It would be manifestly unfair to expect Time Magazine to choose a man of the year who was completelty immune to our scathing snark and searing wit, but it is not unfair to ask that Time magazine not make as heroically stupid a choice as they have done.

Kim Jong-il is launching missiles over the Sea of Japan and Ahmadinejad has the West peeing in its panties -- and I'm special because I watch online videos of cats pouncing on their own shadows between Internet masturbation sessions. Um, OK...

Time hasn't been a good magazine for about 25 years. Time probably peaked in 1958 or something.

I just want to know who Maxim picked for its Person of the Year.

Actually, I think biting the bullets and choosing a "villain" POTY would significantly have reduced the "'snark.'" That at least would require some balls, and might piss off the White House or something.

"You" is just a masturbatory cop out with the spunk being distributed in the metaphorical thousand island dressing of public discourse.

You like Me, you really like Me ..

All I'm saying is, no matter what the subject is, all the commentors seem to be trying to one-up each other in the snark department. Just seems like a harsh reaction to a yearly tradition that doesn't mean anything.

2007 Time Person of the Year: "Everybody Except You."

...and on a toilet in the White House, Bush sits with a copy of Time in one hand, and his forehead in the other, weeping. "The American People still believe in me," he says between chest-heaving sobs.

And then he voids his bowels.

"All I'm saying is, no matter what the subject is, all the commentors seem to be trying to one-up each other in the snark department."

Yep - that's about the long and short of it.

I would totally have praised gjdodger's choice, had it come to pass.

Time for self-loathing.

Ted - The problem isn't just that it's a meaningless ritualistic masturbation about modern society. That alone would be fine, and apropos.

1) The problem is that is doesn't even RISE to the level of useless social commentary about a political or global figure. It rises to the sub-shit strata of a fictional 'societal' movement that doesn't genuinely exist except in fiction. It exists in the heads of retarded 'technocrats' born pre-1970, who actually believe that things like 'teh interwubs' change the composition of the human consciousness. Which is retarded. The evolution of the ability of language itself changed human consciousness. Everything after that is just mush.

2) Even if you subscribe to the banal, skid-marked intellectualism that gives birth to this bullshit, you have to note that the very premise of the 'electronic democracy' that is YouTube is flawed in its outset. Like any communications technology, the ability of people to 'have their say' is entirely dependent upon their treasury. You can participate in the electronic revolution if and only if you have a sustainably high income. Fundamentally, the YouTube phenomenon is actually one of the most divisive things I can possibly imagine, not merely reinforcing, but actually building new differences in the economic strata of society.

I just threw up a little bit in your mouth.

Gary - who says that a villain wasn't chosen?

3) Being huge dicks momentarily distracts us from the crippling pain of existence.

And until Mal Lane blowing someone famous becomes a meaningless yearly tradition, this is all we have.

Alfonso, either you didn't read my post very carefully or you were looking for an excuse to write a very long "sad state of our society" diatribe which nobody cares to read on a celebrity gossip blog. My point was not about Time magazine, but about blog commentators and their tireless efforts to be punchier than the one before them.

Nice try, Time. After the DOJ concluded that the Internet was 99% porn free, I realized that I most certainly do not control the information age. However, I do control Paris Hilton. Yup.

Oh, I also control Ted. I put him on grumpy mode this morning. But later today, I'm going to have Paris give him a BJ.

I disagree about WHO really received TIME's "Person of the Year." It is not you, or me, or us. It is the Internet itself. TIME has anthropomorphized the WWW, as if it is a "you," an "us," a Being. One headline in the TIME article refers to the "Person Of The Year" as the Beast... "The Beast with a billion eyes." It is not really about US. It is about what we are building: the Great Thing.

Besides, how many of us who contribute to the WWW do so pseudonymously, even anonymously? "We" are not persons; we are not "yous." We are personae.

But what is most fascinating is that TIME's own editor, shown in a picture holding a copy of the "Person of the Year" issue, himself appears as the face on the cover. In other words, and this should disturb us all, TIME has awarded the "Person of the Year" honor to itself.

This is not pathetic. It is, frankly, quite scary. There is a freaky twist here, and I hope we're shrewd enough to see it.

But maybe it's not scary at all. Either way, "we" are really being "honored" for being contributors to the "Thing of the Year."

Peace.

BG

Ted: Wonkette cross-post = snark. Blame Pareen.

Have you seen the actual "mirror"? It's a piece of gunked-up foil that seems to have withstood a significant oil spill. You'd go blind if you stared at it too long but you try it anyway. Just like the internet!

You really are the people of the year! God bless the internets.

Have you seen the actual "mirror"? It's a piece of gunked-up foil that seems to have withstood a significant oil spill. You'd go blind if you stared at it too long but you try it anyway. OMG just like the internet!

I hate that. Don't "we/people" shape the world every year?

It's so subtly condescending. They really mean, "You worthless, lazy bastards who normally wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of being POTY, except you got lucky because some new internet software lets you post videos of your colonoscopy."

My mom is so proud.

This should be the picture next to the headline: Lebowski

Why does every time I read 'POTY' I think about my early college years.

Does "controlling the information age" mean "goofing off on the internets during work"? Because if it does, TIME actually got it right.

And, where the fuck is my gift basket?

This doesn't do anything for me. The only award I cared about was People's sexiest man. :/

First of all, I would like to thank God. Secondly, my friends and family, since this award belongs as much to them as it belongs to me...

Wait a second, it does. Crap!

The real TIME Person of the Year: The Internet Stalker.